Posted by pixiestixy on Thursday, November 26th, 2009 - 14 Comments
Tags: chef, cooking, cooking trainer, expiration, fishing, food, high inquisitor, ingredient, pilgrim's bounty, spices, stinky
Welcome to The High Inquisitor, where Project Lore pokes fun at all those crazy, unexplained WoW impossibilities. While the answers to these great mysteries of Azeroth often are a matter of game mechanics, here we’re less interested in that aspect, and more interested in exploring our own unique brand of lore that could happily provide explanations.
Each installment, the inquisitor will attack a previously unanswered question and attempt to explain the unknown. But she won’t rest until all plausible explanations are explored. The best, most probable comment(s) will be highlighted with the next edition’s inquisition.
Looks like it’s time for another High Inquisition, and just in time for the Pilgrim’s Bounty festivities. In commemoration of the food that we’ll all be cooking and eating this week in-game, let’s ask a question that may leave you wondering whether you should have actually just eaten that 37th slice of Pumpkin Pie.
But first, a quick look back at the last inquisition, where we questioned whether spirit healers are inhibiting the progression of the world by bringing everyone back to life time and time again. Many of our readers seemed puzzled by my question, and for that I can only blame myself. Yes, even the High Inquisitor gets writer’s block from time to time, and I don’t believe I gave a solid enough example from which you all could draw your own conclusions.
Here’s one: The spirit healer actually is looking toward the end-game, where players have to have earned a certain amount of fighting experience (what we like to call level 80) to take down the ultimate big bad. If the spirit healer didn’t bring back all those creatures that we kill along the way to that quest, then everyone else wouldn’t be able kill them and also get experience. It can be a troublesome loop at times, but it works.
And here’s another way to phrase it, as said by Innosinned :
…So, the question remaining is, do the enemies have a Spirit Healer? We don’t really know much about Spirit Healers, I think. Maybe they only choose to resurrect those who do good in this world. Maybe we players are allowed to linger as spirits and find our bodies back, because we are needed for a future goal, like beating the Lich King or whatever comes after he is dead.
Well put, my friend!
And now onward to this special, food-inspired edition. Straight to the question this time: What in the crazy world of Azeroth makes our food stay good for so long?
During this week’s special Pilgrim’s Bounty festivities, we make a lot of food. And, as expected, leftovers can only stay good for so long. Once all your event-inspired foods are made, they only have a duration of seven days. The same was true of our Trick-or-treat goodies, too.
But they are the exception to the rule in Azeroth. For some reason, be it magic, really good preservation, or otherwise, most of our food and feasts have no expiration date. Think about that Fish Feast that we all partake in before a raid. Do you really know how old it is?
Who knows how long the chef may have held on to those Musselback Sculpin, Glacial Salmon and Nettlefish before combining them with Northern Spices to create that tasty (and power-boosting) feast. Once the concoction was made, how long did it sit in his bank or bags before he used it? And wouldn’t you think chefs (and their bottomless bags) must really stink while carrying all that food around?!
One plausible explanation: those spices - be they mild spices, northern spices, hot spices, soothing spices, holiday spices — you get the point — must have some kind of mystical preserving power that keeps our food delicious and safe-to-eat forever. But then what about the recipes that no longer call for said spices?
Or perhaps its not the ingredients we use, but the skill with which they are prepared. Maybe those cooking trainers are a strict bunch who won’t pass on their recipes unless the trainee learns the secret of how to make the food last during wartime.
Whatever the case, this is one week during which we’ll all have plenty of freshly-prepared food. Eat up, while you can! And while you’re at it, share your own thoughts on Azerothian foods in the comments section below. Happy Turkey-time!
Related Posts: The High Inquisitor: Why Doesn’t Azeroth have Changing Seasons?, The High Inquisitor: With Respawns and Spirit Heals, Who Can Win?, The High Inquisitor: Where Are All the Kids?, Mage, WoW Life Lesson #23 - Learn How To Cook,
By Necro on Thursday, November 26th, 2009 at 5:36 pm
My honest opinion, if anyone can eat food of which one ingredient are Murloc eyes, why not eat food that’s gone bad 10 days ago?
Both should taste pretty much horrible.
By Mark on Thursday, November 26th, 2009 at 6:06 pm
Simple.
Due to the presence of Spirit Healers, no corpse is allowed to putrefy. Thus bacteria that would spoil food have never had a chance to evolve in Azeroth.
By shamtastik on Thursday, November 26th, 2009 at 7:45 pm
Well since we are using “bottomless” bags that’s connected to the vacuum-like nether, I’m assuming that the vacuum keep it “fresh” for an eternity :d
By Talcoya on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 12:17 am
Everyone in the World of Warcraft always uses Glad bags so everything can stay nice and fresh!
By elfofblood on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 5:04 am
first block ftw
By amidaman on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 6:22 am
a little history lesson would serve you well, in the medieval era spices where ofter used by peasants etc to cover up the taste of decayed food
By havertalin on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 7:33 am
1. first comment woot woot
2. i think that all the food when bound up in those big bags of ours have some sorta spell on them that makes them last SO long i mean come on what has happened to all the food we used to carry in our low lvl day that we never got around to selling………or it could be that once this delicious food hit our bags (we usually have all that mage weave bags that the tailors have to make through magic) the magic perserves the food so we can open our seemingly endless bags and fish out those perserved foods
By Nextgener@aol.com on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 9:42 am
it’s easy. I keep a Fridge in my Backpack.
By Hatell on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 3:24 pm
I say it’s the bags. >.> I mean, we don’t know how in the world they really hold all of our stuff. Maybe they also have a time stop on the items placed in them. Thus the food you pull out is just as fresh as when you put it in there.
Same with the many heads, feet, hooves, and other body parts we’ve had to dig out from monsters and bad guys before.
By Azurienautei on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 5:04 pm
Well, I’ve some theories. One, is the idea of pickling food. Yes, some foods are specifically pickled, but in the cases of fish, meats, and vegetables, isn’t it possible that in learning how to cook, we learn how to pickle? There’s also the process of smoking, which also helps keep food preserved. Fresh fruits and vegetables (especially when taken to Northrend) could be dunked in barrels in water to be kept cold, via refrigeration, for months. As far as banks, maybe the tellers, when seeing someone come in with food, have a large freezer in the back where they keep such things until the adventurer returns. Then they’re given their frozen goods, and are able to prepare them later during raids or when they need to grab a hearty bite on the go. As for things purchased by vendors, especially in Dalaran, I have no doubt that they’ve been magically enhanced to preserve for longer durations than ordinary food.
By Kazzoo on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 7:46 pm
whats with the peter pic…..First!!!!
By poz18 on Friday, November 27th, 2009 at 9:53 pm
stooge
By Thrall'sleave on Sunday, November 29th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
True enought we have magical vaccum-sealed, nether-connected, mary-poppins style bags which OF COURSE all have the glad fresh seal on them. AND these are all the same bags who for those of us before WoTLK we used to hold 25 or more mounts, vanity pets, two handed axes, off-spec gear, etc.. But as with the first comment I agree we use some of the worst things and in some meals dont even cook them (Even if we do, are they well done?). Also just to be picky, all the Pilgrims stuff uses honey (IT COULD BE POOH’S). Why not be magical honey which preserves anything?I’m not sure that we are going to find the most logical answer for this but I enjoy that Blizz marked all our Imbued Frostweave Bags with the Glad Fresh seal mark and technology.
By Azurienatei on Sunday, November 29th, 2009 at 8:59 pm
I’d also like to add, there’s the process of dehydrating food. Making jerky or dehydrated fruits and vegetables. Especially in the case of fruit, it can keep for nearly 2 years if you do it right. All you need is a little water, and boom, its back to flavorful life.