Born atop a grassy hill in Stranglethorn Vale, Jimmy was a unique gem in a world filled with common respawns. He was the lone rare white tiger, the elite of the elite. Known to all the other beasts as King Bangalash, he ruled the land with savagery and ruthlessness. One day, a vertically challenged red haired Scottsman named Dorkins came along and forced Jimmy into a strange love ritual, involving an ice block and floating hearts (scientists are looking into it). At first Jimmy was very rebellious, constantly demanding food and blood, but soon he gained the necessary 6 levels of loyalty and became Dorkins' best friend. Currently the duo makes their home in the Outlands, killing and pillaging daily in hopes of obtaining the only thing that really matters, purple epic goodness.
What The Hell Is With The Cheap Meat???
Posted by Jimmy on Friday, July 25th, 2008 - 15 Comments
I’m starting to think maybe Dorkins isn’t buying the highest quality meats. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the smoked talbuk venison and all. Whenever I’m chillin with my buddies in a raid, though, it seems their owners always give them clefthoof ribs, and damnit they smell so f***ing delicious!!! Look, i’m ... More
Dorkins Is Cheating On Me
Posted by Jimmy on Friday, June 27th, 2008 - 6 Comments
So, obvioiusly, I love Dorkins. He’s the best. He feeds me good meat, strokes my fur, and lets me kill horde. We are best friends. But lately he’s been leaving me in the stables in favor of that stupid wind serpent “Steve”. I hate Steve, he thinks he’s so cool with that lightning breath ... More
Dorkins Is The Best Pet Owner In The World…of Warcraft.
Posted by Jimmy on Wednesday, June 18th, 2008 - 3 Comments
I swear to all that is holy, including paladins and priests, if you screw with Dorkins…I will turn red, grow really big, then rip your face off and defecate on your dead corpse. Are We Clear?! That is a warning to everybody, including you party members. Man I need some meat.